Update on our Week

It's been a while since I have posted on the blog and I am getting a lot of anxious friends wanting updates on Carson's neuropsych testing. Our original plan was for Carson to have 4 two hour testing sessions. Well, after the first session, it was clearly obvious that two hours was going to be a bit much for Carson! Surprise, surprise!!! So, instead we opted for 7 one hour sessions...we planned to drive to Bellevue every day this week to complete these sessions. Well...the good news is is that Carson completed his testing in 5 sessions!!! The bad news is...mom got a speeding ticket on the way home from a session! Nothing like Logan telling me that "mommy drive too fast!"

I attended the first session with Carson and dad attended the second session. By the third session, I had to bring Logan with us ('cause he was sick with another ear infection....poor guy!), so we opted to try having Carson test by himself. No big deal! As a matter of fact, he did a really good job all by himself! So, by the 4th session, I thought that we would just continue with Carson attending these sessions by himself...and he did! Way to go Carson! We did a lot of rewarding Carson...before and after these testing sessions, we would walk around the business park! Carson (and Logan) were in heaven! The business park, in their eyes was like a camping area, complete with trees, paths and 'rock walls'! Carson would climb up and down the rock wall and when Logan came, Carson had to 'teach' Logan how to climb the rock wall as well! This particular office was the only pediatric practice in the business park...and it quickly became clear that the business park was not used to having kids in 'their area'. By the end of our testing sessions, we had a big dude come up to us saying that they had a complaint of kids playing on the rock wall! Yep, those are my kids! He says, "Please do not allow them to climb on this rock wall." "Why?," I ask. "Well, if they get hurt on the rock wall, then you can sue us." I thought...my boys WILL hurt themselves because they are boys...and believe me, you are the last person I would think of suing. Can you tell there were lawyers in this business park? ARGH!!! Now I have a devastated little boy because he cannot decompress on the rock wall! Hmmm...maybe that gentleman should have neuropsych testing done and see what sort of stress he needs to work off? I bet he would want to climb the rock wall too! Oh well...luckily that night we were notified that Carson had completed his testing, so we wouldn't be 'bothering' them anymore! Believe me, I was ready to allow Carson to continue climbing the rock wall and have them call the cops...and then kindly explain why my child needed to climb the rock wall! Bummer that I wasn't able to enjoy that...I would have enjoyed the look of guilt on his face! We won't have the results until August 12th!!!

Oh...I've been meaning to post these photos! These are drawings that Carson has made. Carson LOVES to do art! So, especially when he has gone to daycare...we bring home A LOT of art! So, I asked him about these particular pictures and this is what he said!

This is a 'golf course!' Impressive, I thought! He has been obsessed with golfing ever since he found out that Grandpa George golfs! He even laid out some clothes for going golfing with grandpa...he says that you have to wear polo shirts...and he picked out his own polo shirt! Very cute!

This second picture is a map...a TREASURE MAP! He says that the treasure is where the 'X' is!

I have been off from work this past week and have spent most of it with the boys. On Monday, I was able to help chaperon Carson's daycare classroom to the Ballard Locks (to see the cool boats going from Puget Sound to Lake Union and the salmon ladders). I was in charge of only one child (my own) while other chaperons were in charge of three! Hmmm...does that mean that Carson is equivalent to three kids? Some days I would definitely agree! Anyhow...we had a blast! Carson thinks he is the most special boy in the world when he gets to pack his lunch for a field trip...and Logan CANNOT come! Here are a few photos from our day!

We visited the botanical gardens and Carson had to 'smell' ALL the flowers! So cute!

After lunch, we had some time to run around in the fields and Carson wanted to play with the 'bigger kids' from daycare! It was so cute to see him bend down to race just like the big kids do!

Then later in the week, we got to go to a concert in the park! The boys thought they were super duper special when we got to pick up McDonald's for lunch and take our 'backpack chairs' (lawn chairs with a backpack attached) to the concert! You should have seen those boys smile!! When we got to the concert, Carson spotted Miss Rachael, his most favorite daycare teacher, and he was in heaven FOR SURE!

Like those sun glasses?

Logan forgot his cool sunglasses in the car, so he had to beg to use mommy's sunglasses!

Then after the concert, we played at our favorite water park...right next door! (water fountains coming up from the ground) They were very ready for naps and so was mom!

Our yard was in dire need of major weeding, etc., Since I had some spare time on my hands (yeah right...spare time??) I tackled the yard and got it in darn good shape by the end of the week! (Dad...don't ever say that I don't help in the yard!) It was a bit therapeutic for me...weeding is right up my 'picking everything' alley and power tools (like hedge trimmers and blowers) are great at taking out some aggression! The boys even helped me pick up after all the cutting!

In the backyard, there is a section that Carson has been watering, saying that he is watering his flowers! Poor guy didn't realize that the reason why those flowers were bloomin' was because the weeds had gone to the bloomin' stage! Not a good thing! So, when he saw me pulling is flowers, Carson was not a happy camper! I had to think real fast and came up with "Oh Carson, it's OK...we should go to Home Depot and get some really pretty flowers to plant tomorrow!" "OK mom...it's a deal!" So, off to Home Depot we went the following day to fulfill my promise! Carson picked out some really pretty flowers and was a super big helper planting them as well!



Carson waters the flowers everyday and he makes sure to water around the flowers (instead of on top of them) so the flowers don't bend (so Carson says)!

Carson even found a yummy worm along the way as well! Hmmm....Yummy!

Stay tuned for another post on our weekend! Our cousins came to visit us from Portland and boy, did we have fun!

Back to work and daycare tomorrow!

You mean this behavior monster thing might actually have a name???

It seems that in the past 6 months, this behavior monster thing keeps rearing it's head in our daily lives...and believe me, it is no pretty thing!

This brings me to the 'Daily Groove' topic of the day (thank you Scott Noelle at www.enjoyparenting.com/dailygroove):

:: Love the Behavior, Too ::

When a child's behavior is deemed inappropriate, the
conventional wisdom is to "Love the child, hate the
behavior."

Hmmm... It'd be nice if children could make the subtle
distinction between self and behavior, but even adults
have a hard time with that! If your partner tells you
s/he hates your behavior, is it any less discouraging
to hear, "but I love YOU"?

Our behavior is a reflection of who we are at the
moment. Hating your child's behavior is like saying
you don't love the part of your child that wants to
behave that way. To love unconditionally, you must
find a way to love the behavior, too.

Fortunately, *loving* unwanted behavior doesn't mean
*wanting* it or even tolerating it. You can love
unwanted behavior even as you take steps to change it!

But be open to the possibility that Love will
transform you, your child, and your relationship, such
that you no longer feel a need to change anything.

Now...snap out of it!! Back to reality here at blog central! Hmmm...not so sure that I will ever really LOVE THAT BEHAVIOR!

Because the last several months have gotten tougher and tougher for Carson...with no improvement in sight, I had another 'mommy hunch' that there had to be more to Carson than just SPD. Despite all the sensory regulation in the world, there had to be another reason for Carson's ability to scream at me (and others) directly in our face, for his over-reactivity to seemingly little things, for his instantaneous flip from a good mood to a bad mood, for his amazing ability to throw an incredible fit, etc., etc., etc., So, I have jumped back on the advocacy path for my child.

Last week I called Gayle Faye, a pediatric neuropsychologist in Bellevue. I was told that they could do some neuropsychological testing of Carson (and what can neuropsychological testing provide?) and that we could meet with her today!!

OK...so luckily, our first meeting with Gayle was just with me (Carson didn't have to come)! WHEW!!! It's a whole lot easier to talk uninterrupted when you don't have the little one with you! And...she totally got it! She understood that we had our hands full! And then when she found out that Logan was also affected with SPD and dyspraxia (motor planning difficulties)....she really knew that we had our hands full! By the end of our hour together, she promised me that she and her staff would be able to help us! Her staff would need to meet with Carson during the upcoming weeks for 4 two hour blocks of time...this is when they would do the neuropsych testing. She also told me that she would try to find me some additional resources (maybe some help with some respite childcare) and that Carson would most likely need an all day developmental preschool program to help him get a better handle on self-regulation (not just the 9 hours a week we were getting during the school year) and that he would more than likely be diagnosed with PDD-NOS (more to come on this in a moment). She said that I have been doing a phenomenal job getting my boys help...with very little provided resources (I'll take a pat on the back any 'ole time).

So...off I went to the front desk to set up our 4 two hour blocks of time...they will be completed in the next two weeks!

Neuropsychological testing is a procedure that measures and identifies cognitive impairment and functioning in individuals. It provides quantifiable data about the following aspects of cognition:

- Short-term and long-term memory
- Ability to learn new skills and solve problems
- Attention, concentration and distractibility
- Logical and abstract reasoning functions
- Ability to understand and express language
- Visual-spatial organization
- Visual-motor coordination
- Planning, synthesizing and organizing abilities

Now, more on PDD-NOS...As per Autism Speaks, "Pervasive Developmental Disorder - Not Otherwise Specified, or PDD-NOS, for short, is a condition on the spectrum that has those with it exhibiting some, but not all, of the symptoms associated with classic autism. That can include difficulty socializing with others, repetitive behaviors, and heightened sensitivities to certain stimuli"

You can see Pervasive Developmental Disorder as what is referred to as "the spectrum" or "the autism spectrum" with kids having the least amount of symptoms being diagnosed with Asperger's and kids having the most symptoms being diagnosed with Autism. So, those kids who do not fit either profile are diagnosed with "PDD-NOS" because there is no other name to give these kidos. No guarantee that this will be the diagnosis we end up with! We'll let the testing decide for sure.

So...off we go to do our neuropsych testing! Our first one is this Friday!

Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we embark on this unfamiliar adventure to hopefully 'greener pastures'!

Our Week So Far and Funny Video

I was scheduled to work 3 days this week and I had a bunch of appointments today, meaning that the kids were going to be in daycare 4 days this week. And at least 3 of those days were going to be long days at daycare. Looking at our schedules this week, I decided to keep the boys home with me on Wednesday. I thought we could do something fun together! The boys were very excited to have a 'stay at home' day in the middle of the week! And then when they found out that I had fun plans for the day...they were higher than a kite!

There was a free kid's concert (Tickle Toon Typhoon) in the park that I thought we could give a try. The boys helped me pack our lunch for the concert and were so very excited! Logan kept asking "where is concert, mom?" I kept telling him that I would show him when we got there. We had never been to this particular location before, so it didn't do any good explaining to Logan...he just didn't have 'history' to draw from.

We showed up at the concert and quickly ran into a bunch of friends we all knew...including the 'Rainbow Room' from daycare! Carson was the one who pointed them out..."look mom...friends I know!" So, off we go to say hi to our friends. We ate our lunch and then the concert started. It didn't take long for Carson to get a bit restless. "Mom, can I go run around on the grass?" "Sure Carson, go run around!" Of course, Logan had to run around with his big brother...so mommy followed close behind.

Before I knew it, we had totally left the concert and were over at the water park area. This is one of those water parks that water squirts up from the ground and the kids can run around a get wet (kind of like outside sprinklers). The grounds keepers were trying to get the water park up and running for our summer and the boys saw a tiny bit of water coming out of two of the sprinklers. Off they run to check out the water. It didn't take long for me to call the boys over, remove their shoes and roll up their pants. It was quite evident to me that despite the 60 degree weather we had that day...that I was going to be taking MY boys home WET! Boy was I right!

There was also this big, huge ball in the middle of the water park area and it didn't take long for Carson to want to climb up the ball! He saw some other boys run and then jump up onto the top of the ball. Carson patiently watched as they did their thing. Then Carson tried to do it also...he quietly walked to the sidelines, then took off running toward the ball, but when he got to the ball, he was confused why he couldn't just jump up onto the ball...it was soooo cute! You should have seen his face of confusion! I offered to help Carson climb up and there he sat (I'm sure thinking he ruled the world) and sat and sat. I then showed him how he could slide down the side of the ball as if it were a slide. Before I knew it, Logan was wanting up to do the same exact thing!

After the concert was over, it was time to head back home for nap! Once we got home, I let the boys watch about 10 minutes of TV and before I knew it, Carson was letting me know that his 'eyes weren't able to stay open!'...and then he quickly conked out on the couch! I put Logan to bed, then came back to put my already sleeping Carson to bed as well. Carson woke up around 4:30pm and was excited to see that Logan was still sleeping...hmmm, he said, "mom, I need cuddles!" We sat on the couch watching 'The Incredibles' and I swear he was the most content kid ever...'cause he had mom's undivided attention (and it wasn't being shared with his brother). Miraculously, Logan slept until 6pm, when I actually had to go wake him up! Can you believe that? Logan slept from 1:45pm until 6pm...and from the looks of it, Logan could have slept longer than 6pm. But, mom had selfish intentions...I DID want him to go back to bed at our usual 8pm bedtime! All in all...I guess they had a good day! Good sleep too!

CONSEQUENCES
Carson and Logan are slowly learning about consequences! They don't like consequences too well...well, actually...who does?? Anyhow, I'm determined that if my boys cannot treat their things nicely, then they don't get the privilege of playing with them (or having them in their rooms). Logan lost ALL of his furniture in his room this past weekend (except of course, his bed...and his too heavy dresser (which I just turned around toward the wall instead). I got tired of him getting up before 5am and also destroying his room when that did happen. So, as was suggested by our neurologist, Dr. Glass, all things should then be removed from his room. His room is for sleeping. If he is waking up too early, then his room should be as unappealing as possible...in hopes that his only other alternative would be to 'go back asleep'. Logan is slowly earning his furniture (and CD player) privileges back.

Well...Carson finally joined the 'losing bedroom furniture privileges' this evening. He is totally mistreating his furniture...throwing his desk onto the ground, moving his small dresser over to the door to try to unlock his door (there's a door latch on top of his door...and if he can make himself tall enough, he can easily move the lock over...that took him all of about 3 minutes to figure out!) and messing with his new nite lite (who put's programmable buttons on the back of a nite lite anyhow...along with an on/off switch that makes the nite lite COMPLETELY lose all programming??? ARGH!!!) Maybe it's us 'parents' who are a little slow at this stuff...'cause my boys figure things out QUICKLY!

Well...I would say that both boys are learning about consequences this week! Bless their little hearts...I hope they are sleeping well right now!

OK...now onto the super funny video! One of my friends sent me this video and I just had to share it with all of you! I hope you laugh hysterically like Carson, Logan AND myself did! Enjoy!


After watching this video a half dozen times, Carson turns to me and says, "Mom, can I do that some day?" How cute is that?

Grandma and Grandpa George are coming to relieve my parenting post on Saturday for a couple of hours so I can go to an SPD Support Group...'cause I really am in need of some support!

Have a great rest of your week! I plan to...

Much Better Day!

Monday was a much better day! Thank God! I'm not sure I could sustain that kind of child destruction, defiance and non-compliance for much longer! I hate to say it, but deep down I can somewhat understand why some parents kill their child(ren)! Now, don't take this the wrong way...I would NEVER do that because I have functional coping mechanisms in my life AND I have kid's bedrooms that LOCK!!! I'm just saying that...I can understand it!

Kelly is off to Italy until July 15th! Yep...that's 10 days of me being a single parent! Sometimes I actually enjoy Kelly being gone (honey, please don't take this the wrong way). I enjoy the simplicity of doing things a little different when daddy is gone...it's OK to have scrambled eggs or pancakes for dinner (not Kelly's favorite meal), I get control of the TV REMOTE (which includes NOT having the TV on at all...oh the solitude of silence!) and we get into 'OUR ROUTINE'! However, having said that, we all MISS daddy! Especially when he is in another country and we don't have easy access to him! (And yes MOM, I have Kelly's flight itinerary AND emergency contact numbers!) We especially miss daddy when we have emergencies that take a lot out of mommy (like evening ER visits, bad days, mice in the house, etc.,). Oh please keep us in your thoughts and prayers that we won't have any emergencies in the next 10 days!

On another note...We are very close to having our rental house on the market! It should be on the market by the end of this week! Keep your fingers crossed that it will sell easily and quickly (yep...I even have 'power of attorney' in case we get an offer while Kelly is in Italy)!

I dropped the boys off at daycare on Monday anxious to get to work (or maybe it was 'just wanting to be away from the boys') and I felt like I needed to prepare daycare for their potential day ahead. I told them we had a horrific weekend and to just be prepared that the weekend may continue into their day as well. They appreciated the 'heads up' and I went on my way. They said that they would call me if they had 'issues.' I went to work and I surely WASN'T going to call and check on Carson...'cause, to be honest with you, I DIND'T WANT TO HEAR IT! I was honestly expecting that they would call me to say that "Carson was putting other kids at risk of danger" and that I needed to pick him up. If I had to leave work to pick him up, I honestly thought that I might have to quit my job right then and there. Remember, I am an agency pharmacist and I am relieving companies who are ALREADY having staffing issues...I don't need to introduce my own staffing issues into their already messed up schedules! I never heard from daycare AT ALL! Hmm...this could be a good sign...and it could also not be a good sign...maybe they were feeling sorry for me and were actually trying to spare me the pain? Hmmm...I reluctantly went to pick them up after work...I walked into Carson's classroom...and there stood a very happy boy! Hmmm...what happened to my crazy child? Don't get me wrong...I love my happy child way more than my crazy child! I reluctantly asked how Carson's day went. His teacher said that he had one altercation with another child on the playground. But, on 'the Carson scale of days'...this was a GOOD ONE! WOW...you can imagine my surprise! Off we went to home to have dinner! (Maybe their drastic behavior change had to do with the big weather change??? It was sunny in the 70's over the weekend and then changed to hazy/clouds in the 50-60's on Monday. Hmmm...anyone ever experience child behavior changes due to weather changes???)

I often feel that I only blog about the bad things going on in our family. I guess this is mostly because I really need to get it off my chest...and get support from my fellow blog readers! I would like to share some funny stories that have happened in the last 24 hours...'cause this is what I truly want to remember about MY BOYS!

So, shortly after we got home, Carson tripped over one of daddy's drills (yes, the kids play with one of daddy's drills) and Carson went into this big major fit...full of tears and screaming! I quickly went over to the drill and started reprimanding the drill, "Drill, don't you do that again! Drill, quit tripping Carson or you are going to have to go to time out!" Hmm...I waited...and before I knew it, Carson was now hysterically laughing! Whew...got out of that fit!

I went on to finish getting the kid's dinner ready and before I knew it, Carson came up to me saying that the drill just tripped him again! So, into action I went! "Drill, you are going to have to go to timeout!" Carson says, "Mom, put drill in your room...and lock the door!" So off I trotted to put drill in our room and I locked the door! The evening continued like this...eventually Carson was doing the disciplining of drill! It was very very cute to see what things Carson did to drill! By the end of the night, drill had gotten out of timeout all by himself (can't imagine how that happened!) and ended up in timeout for the entire night...couldn't come out until the next morning! Soon...Logan was participating as well! Hilarious...really! And very insightful as to how the boys perceived the same discipline inflicted on them!

Another story: Carson has these imaginary friends...Charly, Tommy and Frankie! He talks about them all the time...mostly they are work friends who he does all sorts of things with! Well, last on Monday night, Logan suddenly started 'working' at the same place as Carson...with his same friends...Charly, Tommy and Frankie! Logan would walk around the house stating that he does 'this' at work and 'that' at work...with his friends...Charly, Tommy and Frankie! It's so cute to see how they pick up things from their siblings! That's just how things are done...in their eyes!

Another story: I was getting ready for work this morning and opened my drawer to get out my jewelry for the day. Hmmm...my bracelet is missing! ARGH!!! The boys got is my drawer AGAIN!!! So, I nicely went up to Carson and asked him if he might know where they are. His usual response is usually, "I don't know mom!" But this morning, he said "Yep...I know where they are. Follow me mom (and his voice gets really quiet)...their in my secret hiding spot!" I follow him to his room and he opens the lid of his desk and voila...there they are! We promptly had a conversation about leaving mommy's things alone and that he is not to touch other people's things unless he asks their permission! "OK mommy!" But how cute was that conversation? And, YEH for me...I found my bracelet!

One more quick story: Logan keeps saying "Me like this, mommy!" "Dat my fabrite!" (translation...I like this mommy...that's my favorite!) and he is copying little things I say like when the kids say "Thank You" I always say "No...Thank YOU!" Logan is now repeating the same thing back to me...in an appropriate context!

I really do love my boys...they can be a big challenge sometimes! But, I cherish the moments like these!

Well...I guess I oughta start working now! Have a fabulous day!

4th of July starts off with a BANG!!!

Why are weekends just pure HELL? I thought weekends were supposed to be about spending time together as a family, sleeping in, cuddling with my husband lying next to me in bed, slowly waking up with a newspaper and my favorite vanilla latte, having the kids wake up while I am sipping my latte...of course, very excited to see me and ask " Is today a stay at home day mom? What fun activity do we get to do today?". OK, maybe I live in a dream world of my "non reality" but hey, you can at least dream, right?

Well...this is SO NOT my reality TODAY! Hubby sleeps on the couch, both boys woke up at 5:30am and I had to remind them that the sun (on their nite lite) was not up yet...it comes up at 5:45am (I am desperately trying to get them to sleep in a bit later)!

The morning starts off with a bang (and how appropriate is that given that it is the 4th of July?)! Logan ends up in his room after I reminded him to use his words instead of whining! It wasn't long before Carson was also in his room after having a fit over mommy not getting him the "right" sippy lid!

Can I please have my cup of coffee...PLEASE?

I eventually get them to start our morning routine of getting dressed (and OMG...you are so wearing your SPIO suits today), brushing teeth and taking vitamins and medicine while daddy was trying to catch a few more zzzz's! FINALLY they can go outside to play while I fix them so pancakes...and it isn't even 6:45am yet! (I sure hope our new neighbors are gone for the holiday weekend...a bitter awakening to say the least!). As you can imagine, it didn't take long for Logan to come in crying cause brother hit him! Oh but the silence in the house when they are outside...is AMAZING!

The boys eventually eat breakfast and go right back outside! Now they are loading up anything and everything into the back of daddy's very old pickup truck (Carson and Logan think this is THEIR play toy)! Carson screams into the house about something traumatic and promptly throws the hammer in his hand onto the floor (for which he loses tool privileges)...back in his room! After cool off in his room, we convinced him to sit down and watch some Curious George. I turn on the TV and find out that our Curious George episodes are no longer there (Comcast was just out the day before giving us a new box...looks like we continue to have problems)! Are you kidding me? It's only 8am and I am already to have the day end!

I then moved onto plan B (or is it plan F by now?) and suggest that we all go to the gym. (Thank you to 24 hour fitness for not only having the gym open but the Kids Club open...ON A HOLIDAY!). I send the boys to their rooms to get their socks...before I know it they are both messing around in Carsons' room! Doesn't anyone have their listening ears on? More fits ensue and now they are both in their rooms with the doors shut! Carson gets his socks on and then comes out of his room and goes outside (fine by me!). I now work on getting Loans socks on and before I know it, Carson is outside banging on Loans bedroom window with a CROWBAR! Can I cry yet? I finally get the boys in the car and tell hubby will wait foe him in the car. He can't find amy shorts...off I go to help him. He finally gets in the van and we promptly start arguing! Door opens and hubby gets out! Off we go to the gym without daddy! I'm telling you...we ARE going to the gym..this may be my only solitude today! So here I am...sitting on the exercise bike blogging and listening to Pandora.com music....boy, how did I survive "PRE Blackberry"? I can ride forever doing this!

My friend Carrie Fannin always says that SPD isn't for sissies! But sometimes I want to throw my hands up with my white flag...and SURRENDER!

Here's to hoping your 4th is a BANG for different reasons than mine! And here's also to hoping we have a better rest of the day!

And don't worry...I will NEVER stop dreaming!

P.S....We arrived home from the gym and I gave hubby a super big hug and said, "We've gotta stick together honey!" He said, "You mean 'US' against 'THEM'?" "ABSOLUTELY!" Love you honey! Thank goodness for dates...we have one set up for tomorrow! WHEW...do you think we can make it until then?

P.S.S...I later learned that there was a full moon this weekend. Has anyone ever experienced wild kids in their homes with a full moon? Hmmm...kinda makes you think!