You mean this behavior monster thing might actually have a name???

It seems that in the past 6 months, this behavior monster thing keeps rearing it's head in our daily lives...and believe me, it is no pretty thing!

This brings me to the 'Daily Groove' topic of the day (thank you Scott Noelle at www.enjoyparenting.com/dailygroove):

:: Love the Behavior, Too ::

When a child's behavior is deemed inappropriate, the
conventional wisdom is to "Love the child, hate the
behavior."

Hmmm... It'd be nice if children could make the subtle
distinction between self and behavior, but even adults
have a hard time with that! If your partner tells you
s/he hates your behavior, is it any less discouraging
to hear, "but I love YOU"?

Our behavior is a reflection of who we are at the
moment. Hating your child's behavior is like saying
you don't love the part of your child that wants to
behave that way. To love unconditionally, you must
find a way to love the behavior, too.

Fortunately, *loving* unwanted behavior doesn't mean
*wanting* it or even tolerating it. You can love
unwanted behavior even as you take steps to change it!

But be open to the possibility that Love will
transform you, your child, and your relationship, such
that you no longer feel a need to change anything.

Now...snap out of it!! Back to reality here at blog central! Hmmm...not so sure that I will ever really LOVE THAT BEHAVIOR!

Because the last several months have gotten tougher and tougher for Carson...with no improvement in sight, I had another 'mommy hunch' that there had to be more to Carson than just SPD. Despite all the sensory regulation in the world, there had to be another reason for Carson's ability to scream at me (and others) directly in our face, for his over-reactivity to seemingly little things, for his instantaneous flip from a good mood to a bad mood, for his amazing ability to throw an incredible fit, etc., etc., etc., So, I have jumped back on the advocacy path for my child.

Last week I called Gayle Faye, a pediatric neuropsychologist in Bellevue. I was told that they could do some neuropsychological testing of Carson (and what can neuropsychological testing provide?) and that we could meet with her today!!

OK...so luckily, our first meeting with Gayle was just with me (Carson didn't have to come)! WHEW!!! It's a whole lot easier to talk uninterrupted when you don't have the little one with you! And...she totally got it! She understood that we had our hands full! And then when she found out that Logan was also affected with SPD and dyspraxia (motor planning difficulties)....she really knew that we had our hands full! By the end of our hour together, she promised me that she and her staff would be able to help us! Her staff would need to meet with Carson during the upcoming weeks for 4 two hour blocks of time...this is when they would do the neuropsych testing. She also told me that she would try to find me some additional resources (maybe some help with some respite childcare) and that Carson would most likely need an all day developmental preschool program to help him get a better handle on self-regulation (not just the 9 hours a week we were getting during the school year) and that he would more than likely be diagnosed with PDD-NOS (more to come on this in a moment). She said that I have been doing a phenomenal job getting my boys help...with very little provided resources (I'll take a pat on the back any 'ole time).

So...off I went to the front desk to set up our 4 two hour blocks of time...they will be completed in the next two weeks!

Neuropsychological testing is a procedure that measures and identifies cognitive impairment and functioning in individuals. It provides quantifiable data about the following aspects of cognition:

- Short-term and long-term memory
- Ability to learn new skills and solve problems
- Attention, concentration and distractibility
- Logical and abstract reasoning functions
- Ability to understand and express language
- Visual-spatial organization
- Visual-motor coordination
- Planning, synthesizing and organizing abilities

Now, more on PDD-NOS...As per Autism Speaks, "Pervasive Developmental Disorder - Not Otherwise Specified, or PDD-NOS, for short, is a condition on the spectrum that has those with it exhibiting some, but not all, of the symptoms associated with classic autism. That can include difficulty socializing with others, repetitive behaviors, and heightened sensitivities to certain stimuli"

You can see Pervasive Developmental Disorder as what is referred to as "the spectrum" or "the autism spectrum" with kids having the least amount of symptoms being diagnosed with Asperger's and kids having the most symptoms being diagnosed with Autism. So, those kids who do not fit either profile are diagnosed with "PDD-NOS" because there is no other name to give these kidos. No guarantee that this will be the diagnosis we end up with! We'll let the testing decide for sure.

So...off we go to do our neuropsych testing! Our first one is this Friday!

Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we embark on this unfamiliar adventure to hopefully 'greener pastures'!